Monday, September 8, 2008

Still got germs

Man is my body throwing me challenges. If the chronically infected sinuses werent bad enough, i am now on 3 months of antibiotics, which means i need to be on the anti fungals to stop the candida coming back. To add insult to injury i got conjunctivitis. Of course it wasnt conjunctivitis that could be treated with eye drops. No it was viral so i just had to ride it out. Great!!!! sore puffy gritty eyes and another day off work. Bit hard to work when one can't see what one is doing. Sleeping was wonderful. CPAP mask on my nose and an icepck covered in a pillow case on my eyes. I was stunning. Now my eyes are starting to clear and my face is getting sore. I dont know if it is my TMJ or my parotid gland but something is tight and sore and i feel i have two little golf balls under my tongue. Sure why not!!!!!! lets see what sort of infection i can get out of this.

Its so hard not to feel down sometimes. I am so worried about my job, my finances, my relationship, my future. I have dreams. Yet at the same time when i feel like this i then fel guilty because there are so many people who are way worse off than me. I have a roof over my head, food on the table, i have nice things, i can get about, i got my license. Still i want my health. I dont want everything to be a trade off.
Anyway i will continue to moisturise the eyes, lubricate the mouth, wash out the sinuses and look after the gut. Rest when i can and look forward to those days when i can get out do do stuff.
I have got more of an appreciation of the good times and dont take them for granted these days.
I have learnt to be less frivolous with money too. Now when i want to make that impulsive spend i think "but what if i cant get to work and dont get paid?" maybe thats one of the lessons i needed to learn from all of this.

Tonight im sending out thoughts and prayers to some special people Denise, Lauren, jangy, pooh, janna, lostman, linda, scottie and her leaky roof, Doggie in chat, Solmom, mompain and all the others in my sjoggie family. May you all be well and i pray my biggest prayer that we can live life to the fullest and show this SOB who's boss. Lets kick some sjoggie ass.
I wont be beaten. You will not win. I'll play your game but i'll play it by my rules. Me and my girls (& boys) will triumph. You might wrack our bodies with pain and destruction but the spirit will not be broken. You will never get that!!!!!!!!!!!

1 comment:

BeBe Blazfemi said...

Oh, how I can identify with you, especially right now! I have what should be "just a cold," like they used to be when I got them, but are now something I fear because it probably means that I will feel almost like I have the flu for a week, and will have sinusitus for another week afterward, and if I'm "lucky," I WON'T get a bacterial sinus infection on top of that like I almost always do!
Sjogren's is FUN! :(